Friday, April 29, 2016

Words from Rosalinda.............Joyce Oroz

Confronting Criticism

Subtle forms of criticism:
  • "So, I guess you haven't started that diet you were talking about?"
  • "Well, if you're satisfied with your job...."
  • "Sometimes, I'm surprised we're friends; just kidding."
Not-so-helpful forms of criticism:
  • "You probably got the promotion because I didn't try for it." (Yeah, that's why.)
  • "Why are you always so cheerful?" (And, that's a bad thing?)
  • "People who are like fifty, shouldn't be in management ...Uh, not you; you're not "old" like them." (Nice try.)
Before you respond, consider asking yourself these questions:
  1. Is it necessary to respond?
  2. What is my point?
  3. How will it help?
Here are few "professional" responses: (From my book, "Don't Burp in the Boardroom")
  • Thank you, I'll take that into consideration. (Even if you don't intend to.)
  • Although I'm not sure that I agree with you, I appreciate your remarks.
  • Hmm, you're the first to mention it. Thank you.
  • I'm not sure I understand. Would you please elaborate? (Risky, you may not want to hear it.)
  • Good to know. Thanks.
  • I'm sorry you feel that way.
Naturally, depending under what circumstances the unsolicited opinion or comment was given, and by whom, our reaction may vary. If you happen to lose it, apologize.

More to consider: A negative remark can be a gift in disguise. After a cooling down period, and before you respond, ponder the remark. We don't always see what other people see in us.
Note: My advice is general and may not suit your particular situation. In addition, there is usually more than one way to handle a dilemma.
If you enjoyed reading this, please pass it on to your colleagues and friends.
Thank you.

#SpreadingCivility
Kind regards,

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Rosalinda Randall

Civility & Etiquette Trainer, Speaker, Media Source, Author
E: rosalinda@rosalindarandall.com
T: 650.871.6200
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